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Rebalancing

Once you see (and truly accept) the ugly that is possible in others, it is hard to go back to unseeing the potential for that ugly in nearly everyone you meet (see last post).  That said, learning to hold back some enthusiasm in the pursuits and efforts that require introducing new people into the collaborative space is difficult. It is my own nature to lean in and push hard on everything I put my mind to accomplish which makes me vulnerable to those who recognize that part of my nature.  Their instinct to take advantage of the efforts of others means that I need to remain vigilant to protect myself which requires me to limit my efforts on their behalf until I am more certain that their values align with my own.

This rebalancing of my natural inclination to support without question to one of a cautious watchfulness of my time, effort, enthusiasm, and intellect is what I find myself focused on these days. In the middle of that, I am finding the questions that interest me to be bubbling up to the surface of my thoughts and I want to focus on those more than focusing on meeting the expectation of others.  


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